Long-Distance Marriage: An Abuja–London Couple on Making It Work
Yewande sits down with a Nigerian couple who spent three years commuting across two continents — and stayed married.
Yewande Balogun
Relationships & Marriage Columnist · Family & relationship writing
Contributor note: Demonstration profile for this portfolio project. Not a real Nigerian journalist.
Long-distance marriage is not new in Nigerian families, but it rarely gets talked about with any honesty. Ada and Tunde — both real people, whose full names we have withheld at their request — spent three years split between Abuja and London while their two-year-old daughter grew up between the two cities. This is what they told us.
Why they did it in the first place
Tunde received a professional posting to London in early 2023. Selling everything and moving the whole family was the obvious option; both of them agreed it was also the wrong one. Ada had a business in Abuja she had spent five years building. They chose to try eighteen months of commuting first, and then extended by another eighteen.
What actually made the difference
'A shared calendar,' Ada says without hesitation. 'People laugh at that until they try it.' Weekly video calls at fixed times, a joint budget for flights and childcare, and a rule that no big decision would be made without a face-to-face conversation — even if that meant waiting a month.
What they would do differently
'We underestimated the second year,' Tunde admits. 'The first year is the honeymoon of the difficulty. The second year, small things stop being cute.' They started monthly counselling sessions in month fifteen. Both credit that with holding the marriage together in year two.
Story highlights
- Couple lived between Abuja and London for three years while raising a toddler.
- Shared calendar and monthly counselling were the two most important tools.
- Neither would recommend a long-distance stretch beyond three years without a clear end date.
What people are saying
- Readers on the timeline are recognising themselves in the second-year advice.
- Marriage counsellors in Lagos say bookings for pre-move sessions have grown.
- Younger couples say the shared-calendar tip is what they are trying first.
Where this fits in the bigger picture
This is one of several marriage stories Nigerians have followed closely in recent weeks. Amebo Central keeps track of these moments so readers get a clear timeline instead of scattered posts across different feeds.
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What to watch for next
Follow the Marriage section for updates. If new details emerge — an interview, a clarification or an official statement — we will update this article with a note at the top and a fresh publication timestamp.
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Story highlights
- Couple lived between Abuja and London for three years while raising a toddler.
- Shared calendar and monthly counselling were the two most important tools.
- Neither would recommend a long-distance stretch beyond three years without a clear end date.
What people are saying
- Readers on the timeline are recognising themselves in the second-year advice.
- Marriage counsellors in Lagos say bookings for pre-move sessions have grown.
- Younger couples say the shared-calendar tip is what they are trying first.
